nursetobe

I so badly wished when I was in my twenties I did have the desire to make friends and fit in, I really wished I would have just focused on me and been so needy lonliness sucks at times but I wished I embraced it more when I was young.

I let myself get punked for so many years. I didn’t have anybody to really stand up for me, connect with me, or support me. I was left to figure it all out, so I was vulnerable to all the poisoning of foster carer, peers , so-called family ,and society, all those doubtful years of not accepting myself for this or that, all the shame I felt as a child because I was supposed to be a mule for mother and for others as opposed to just being a child a teenager and a young adult, I always knew something was a little off, I am not dysfunctional alot of my problems stem from the fact lack of proper parental guidance rather than dysfunction   as everybody wanted to use me for was as a ATMS MAID BABYSITTERS COUSELORS Things are different now I alot older, wiser and greyer I have set boundaries, I helped people because I was being alturistic, I helped my mother because I felt sorry for her, I was acting on my morals and ethics not for her to turn around and try to destroy me, I valued ...

Hindsight  is always 20/20 now looking back since I started this blog in 2009 or 2010 In was a nursing student  who left my nursing diploma course because I was bullied and a mature student damn that sound pathetic especially when I was a mature student not an 18 or 19 year old as embarrassing as it is I cannot beat myself up  LIFE happens now with all the changes Teresa May has made nursing tuition is no longer paid you have to self fund, I do kick myself for not ignoring the bullies or isolation and just muddled along but everything is a learning experience, if I could go back in time I would say literally nothing to know one about education or life goals kept my head down, studied and ignored the haters

You damned if you and damned if you don’t you cannot escape the haters personally I feel Emily Ratajkowski looked good in this dress. Haters gonna hate

I'm almost thirtysomething, and I've had plenty of ups and downs, and some of the downs were bad. I've learned that looking back doesn't help. All that matters is what's in front of you.